It wasn’t a flashy soundbite or a mic-drop moment. It was simple, almost offhand.

She said: “I don’t buy businesses to work more. I buy them to buy back my time.”

And something in me cracked open.

Because I’ve been on both sides.

I’ve lived the 80-hour workweeks. The constant chase. The boardrooms, the deadlines, the highlight reels. I know what it means to look successful and feel trapped.

That’s why Codie’s story stopped me. Because she walked away from the path everyone else admired. And she didn’t just rebel. She reimagined.

She built a system to create wealth intentionally—without losing her soul in the process.

And here’s the twist that might just stop you, too:

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We sat down to talk about her new book, How to Be the Love You Seek, and what unfolded was a deeply moving exploration of how we show up in our relationships, how our childhood stories quietly direct our emotional lives, and what it actually means to love ourselves.

Nicole doesn’t do surface-level. She challenges the overly simplified version of self-love we often hear about. Instead, she defines it as presence—being with yourself fully, especially in the hard moments. That truth alone reframed a lot for me.

She opened up about her own journey—realizing she was emotionally disconnected in her marriage, how she started speaking honestly about her pain, and how healing begins when we stop hiding from our own stories.

What struck me most was her concept of the ego story—the deep-seated beliefs we develop in childhood (like “I’m not enough” or “I’m too much”) that silently shape how we love, trust, and respond in relationships. And then she gave us a way forward: empowerment consciousness. The ability to become aware of our patterns, regulate our emotions, and make conscious choices instead of reacting from old wounds.

This is the heart of her approach to holistic psychology—healing that includes not just the mind, but the body, emotions, and nervous system. It’s personal, it’s practical, and it’s deeply human.

If you’ve ever wondered why you keep repeating the same relational patterns—or how to finally break free—this conversation offers both insight and tools.

Here are a few takeaways that stayed with me:

Listen ad free to Dr. Nicole LaPera as she unpacks how self-healing begins with radical honesty and empowered choice.

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In this deeply human episode, Kris Carr—New York Times bestselling author, wellness advocate, and cancer thriver—joins John R. Miles for a vulnerable and wide-reaching conversation on the emotional terrain of illness, loss, and growth.

Kris has been living with a rare, incurable stage IV cancer for over 20 years. But it wasn’t just the diagnosis that changed her—it was the grief that followed when her adoptive father, her emotional anchor, was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. That loss forced Kris to confront a deeper emotional reckoning—one that most of us avoid.

In this episode, Kris shares how she used that pain as a portal—not just to survive, but to feel more fully alive. Her latest book, I’m Not a Mourning Person, blends humor, raw honesty, and hard-won wisdom to help others navigate the messy, sacred path of emotional healing.

Together, John and Kris explore:

Listen ad-free and discover how emotional honesty might be your most powerful tool for healing.

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In this powerful and deeply moving episode of Passion Struck, I sit down with spiritual teacher and #1 New York Times bestselling author Gabby Bernstein to explore the path from silent suffering to profound inner peace. Through her vulnerability and wisdom, Gabby shares how she found light on the other side of trauma—and how each of us can begin to do the same.

At the height of her outward success, Gabby was privately struggling with unconscious PTSD—a hidden force that shaped her body, mind, and relationships. Her healing began when she stopped hiding, found the courage to confront her pain, and made the choice to speak the unspeakable.

Listen ad free to a raw, hope-filled conversation on trauma, truth, and the miracle of choosing yourself.

Together, we explore:

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The world knew her as a red-carpet powerhouse—a journalist who had interviewed everyone from world leaders to the biggest stars in Hollywood. But behind the glitz and the television lights, Maria Menounos was navigating a reality that no amount of professional poise could mask. While caregiving for her mother during a brutal battle with glioblastoma, Maria began to feel the signals of her own body shifting.

Despite the flat stomach and fitness she was known for, a persistent, basketball-sized bloat appeared. She sought help, underwent scans, and was told everything was fine. But the pain persisted—and as Maria often says, “If the pain persists, so should you”.

What she discovered through a year-long quest for answers is a masterclass in Cognitive Agency: Your intuition is often a more accurate diagnostic tool than a rushed reading of a CT scan.

On Passion Struck, I sat down with Maria Menounos to discuss her harrowing journey through a brain tumor and a neuroendocrine pancreatic cancer diagnosis. We moved past the headlines to explore the Self-Advocacy Mindset—the refusal to be “gaslit” by a flawed system and the courage to become the CEO of your own healthcare situation.

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The Flaw in the “Fine” Scan

Maria’s journey exposed a critical vulnerability in modern medicine: human error within an overwhelmed system. After being told her initial hospital scans were clear, she later learned that a two-centimeter tumor had been visible but missed by the radiologist.

By the time she pushed for an outside full-body MRI months later, the tumor had doubled in size.

What you’re learning: Doctors are human, exhausted, and often working within silos. If you have a scan and still feel pain, the “manual” requires a second opinion on the data itself.

The Application: You must be your own “Internal Auditor.”

• Don’t accept “Normal” if you feel “Broken.” Use your intuition as a prompt to seek outside facilities or secondary readings of your imaging.

• Document the Evidence. Maria took photos of her symptoms in the mirror to ground her reality when the system suggested nothing was wrong.

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Choosing “Wonder Over Worry”

When faced with a diagnosis that feels like a dead end, your brain naturally defaults to predicting the worst possible finale. Maria credits the work of Dr. Joe Dispenza and Tony Robbins with helping her rewire these fear-based thoughts to calm her nervous system.

She adopted a specific cognitive tool: Wonder Over Worry.

What you’re learning: Instead of a 0/10 fear-based loop, you can shift the brain’s “expectancy engine” by asking curious, positive questions.

The Application:

• Instead of “What if the surgery fails?” ask: “I wonder what it will feel like when the doctor calls with good news?”

• Instead of “Why is this happening to me?” ask: “I wonder how this is happening for me to redirect my path?”

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The Caregiver’s Release: Meeting Them Where They Are

Maria’s resilience was forged while watching her Greek immigrant parents fight through disease with a “warrior” spirit. Yet, as a caregiver for her mother, she had to learn the hardest lesson of all: you cannot fight a battle for someone else if they are ready to rest.

What you’re learning: Caregiving is an emotional journey where you must eventually meet the patient where they are, rather than where you want them to be.

The Application:

• Prioritize the Conversation Over the Cure. Maria mustered the courage to cry with her mother and ask for forgiveness for the “short” moments of stress.

• Release the Guilt. By having the tough, awkward conversations early, you release the “Identity Tax” of regret after they are gone.

Takeaways

1. Assume the CEO Role: Doctors are overwhelmed; you are the only person who knows your body’s baseline. If the system gaslights you, find a new doctor.

2. Audit Your Health Literacy: Just as you manage financial literacy, you must manage your health data. If you get a “clean” scan but the pain persists, seek a second opinion immediately.

3. Use the “Yet” Strategy: As my guest, Jen Gottlieb, suggests, if you aren’t good at navigating the system yet, recognize that it is a skill you can learn and implement.

4. Practice Predictive Wonder: Shift your internal narrative from “worst-case scenario” to curious possibility to lower your cortisol and anxiety.

5. Build Your Support Network Before You Need It: Maria’s recovery was supported by a husband, father, and friends who stepped up when her own strength was depleted.

Final Reflection

Maria Menounos’s journey from cleaning nightclubs in Boston to surviving two “fatal” diagnoses shows us that resilience is not a personality trait—it is a decision. It is the steady work of listening to the “quiet voice” of your body over the loud, busy noise of the medical system.

Where have you been ignoring your own intuition? What is the one “uncomfortable” conversation or medical second opinion you’ve been putting off that could reclaim your agency today?

Leave a comment below. Let’s keep this conversation grounded in what works.

Check out the full conversation with Maria Menounos below

Share The Ignited Life: Philosophical First Aid for Being Human

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is like a signal flare…..

It helps this message find the person who is still walking

their own “schoolyard” alone.

Thank you for being part of this ecosystem.

I love turning these essays into a two-way conversation

So please let me know your thoughts below.

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